


Just a copy

by Alja



Series: The Road to the Keyblade War [4]
Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Slight SoKai
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 16:49:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17491640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alja/pseuds/Alja
Summary: Saving Ven meant adding another Guardian of Light to the heroes' roster.It also meant heartache, dug up deep rooted insecurities and made Sora question his sense of self.





	Just a copy

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Kingdom Hearts 3 Countdown Challenge, day 27: Loss

“He was the one who kept my heart safe,” Ven concluded his tale, his eye scanning every person in the room until they fell upon the boy he was talking about. A smile spread over his lips.

“Thank you, Sora.”

Only a few hours ago, Ven had still been asleep. It was thanks to Aqua, Lea and Sora that he was now sitting among them, still a little weak from being out of commission for such a long time, but otherwise upbeat.

And that was thanks to Sora, Ven had explained, by sheltering his wounded heart not once, but _twice_ , and Kairi stared at Sora in awe. Of course, she knew about Roxas’s heart resting inside of Sora’s and two years ago, she herself had been seeking refuge inside his heart. But none of it compared to protecting Ven’s heart for nearly –

“Twelve years,” she repeated and looked back at Ven. It was hard to believe when Ven himself barely looked sixteen years old.

“Twelve years,” he confirmed, but curled his hand against his chin as he grew pensive for a moment. “Well, before that, he already reached out to me when Xehanort split my heart in two.” He slowly started to count with his fingers. “And that was–”

“Four years earlier,” Aqua added. She was sitting next to Ven, occasionally petting his head as if she made sure he was really there. She reminded Kairi of Sora's mother; she, too, had showered her son with affection when he had finally returned after missing for 18 months.

Kairi's smile waned. And now, the poor woman was waiting for her son to return once again.

“Yes! Four years.” A grin spread on Ven’s lips and he threw his hands up to cross his arms behind his head. “So our hearts have been connected for roughly sixteen years, give or take.”

A giggle escaped Kairi.

“I can tell.” When Ven threw her an inquisitive glance, she pointed at his arms.

“Your body language is similar! Sora does this thing where he crosses his arms behind his head all the time. No wonder he does when you've been a part of his heart nearly all of his life. Right, So-?”

His name died on her lips when she heard the scraping of wood against the wooden floor. Kairi quickly turned to her side to look at him, having to crane her neck because he had gotten up.

“Sora?”

“Sorry,” he replied a little sheepishly without meeting her eye.“I just have to check up on something. I’ll be back, soon, okay?”

Upon his words, a heavy feeling spread in the pit of Kairi's stomach, and she lowered her eyes, noticing the plate in front of him. He had barely touched his piece of cake.

“Okay,” she replied anyway and without a single glance back, Sora left the room and Kairi couldn't wait for him to return again.

Except he didn't, even after nearly an hour had passed. By now, it had gotten late and the impromptu party they had thrown together in celebration of Ven’s rescue slowly grew to a close. Aqua escorted Ven to his new room, helping his weak limbs to stay upright, Leon and Yuffie were clearing off the table while Aerith started to fill the dishwasher and Lea hadn’t attended the get-together at all, claiming to feel tired after the rescue.

Kairi grabbed the barely-touched plate of cake Sora had left behind and looked around guiltily. She didn’t want to leave without helping the others, but Aerith waved her off before she could even say something.

“Go, find him. We’ve got this under control.”

Giving her an appreciative smile, Kairi left the kitchen cake in hand as she walked up to the guestroom Sora currently occupied and knocked on the door.

“Sora?”

No answer. She quietly opened the door and peeked inside. The lights were turned off and the bed was still made – he had only entered the room shortly to drop off his backpack. She placed the left-over cake on his desk and left his room again to check on the bathrooms.

They were empty as well.

_Great._

It was already dark when Kairi stepped outside into the cold night. She suppressed a shudder and rubbed her upper arms a few times with her hands before heading out to search for Sora.

She shouldn’t have left him alone.

It was rare for Sora to be upset and even rarer for him to run away to be alone. On Destiny Islands, Kairi knew exactly where to find him because it was the same place she visited when she was feeling upset: the secret place.

But Radiant Garden was huge and Sora could be hiding anywhere – searching for him might take all night and that was assuming he didn't wander around. Frustrated, Kairi balled her fist and held it over her heart, scrunching her eyes shut.

But what if – ?

Her eyes flew open again and flickered up to the outer wall of the city across from her.

If both of them sought out the same place of comfort on Destiny Islands, maybe there was a chance that her favorite place here comforted Sora, too?

It was as good of a lead as any and Kairi quickly rushed down the street and scaled the steps that led up to the wall two at a time. She finally arrived at the top of them, her breathing labored as she turned her head left and right, scanning the illuminated wall for any kind of shadow.

She saw nobody.

Her shoulders slumped in discontentment and she was ready to continue her search down the Bailey when she heard a quiet noise that made her whip her head around.

There! On top of a crane used for the restoration of the city Sora sat, curled up on himself with his head buried in his arms as his form shook slightly

Kairi felt her heart breaking.

As quickly as possible, she climbed up the crane and smoothed her skirt down before she sat next to Sora. She felt him wince upon contact and saw him furiously rub his face against his arm before he looked up at her with a forced grin and puffy eyes.

“Hey Kairi.”

“Oh Sora...” she muttered and reached for one of his hands. He squeezed back tightly. “You didn't finish your cake.”

A chuckle broke out of the boy and his shoulders shook gently as Kairi scooted closer to him.

“Talk to me, please. What's wrong?”

He stayed silent for a moment before answering.

“What if I'm not me?”

“I... don't understand?”

Sora sighed and started to absentmindedly caress Kairi's fingers with his thumb.

“The moment Ven's heart left my chest, there was an emptiness that spread inside of me. I started to feel hollow and I still do. And I know that it makes sense, Ven was part of my heart for basically all of my life, but that's the problem. He joined me when I was just a few days old. And don't get me wrong, I am glad he did! It gave him another chance in life and I would never regret that. But what does our connection mean for _me_?”

Sora turned his head towards Kairi and she saw new, unshed tears shine in Sora's eyes.

“You said it yourself, our body language is similar. From everything I've heard about Ven, we might be brothers, twins even. So what if I'm not actually _me_? What if I'm just Ven's copy?”

“Sora, every single person in our life influences us. I wouldn't be the same person I am now had I grown up in Traverse Town instead of Destiny Islands. You and Riku influenced me, you shaped me into the person I am today, and the same happened with you and Ven. He was close to your heart, of course you might have picked up some of your mannerisms, but that doesn't mean that you're his copy. You're still _you_.”

“You saw Roxas. What does he look like?”

Kairi knitted her eyebrows together in confusion, but decided to indulge Sora for a moment.

“He has your facial structure. Blue eyes. Blond hair, wind-swept...” She gasped.

Of course. That explained why Lea had opted to stay out of the festivities; Ven's appearance reminded him too much of his missing friend. Kairi filed this revelation away for tomorrow though, now, Sora needed her.

“Exactly,” Sora agreed and shuddered. “Roxas, my body and soul. He doesn't look like me the way Lea and Axel look the same. Instead, he looks exactly like Ven.”

“Sora-” Kairi started, but Sora interrupted her, his voice growing more solemn.

“Xemnas alluded to it before. He asked me if I can say for sure that I'm not just someone else's copy. And I honestly can't anymore.”

“You can't trust Xemnas! He wants you to doubt yourself, he wants you to give up! He'd tell you _anything_ to make you use the Darkness!”

“That's another thing that troubles me,” Sora confessed and let his head loll against the crane behind their backs.

“You heard Ven's tale, how his heart is full of Light because Xehanort split off the Darkness in his heart, Vanitas?” Kairi nodded. “Ven has a pure heart of Light – and he was inside of me. And everyone trusts me to have a strong Light that keeps the Darkness at bay, a Light that is so much brighter than other people's Light – but what if that's not the case? What if it was Ven's Light all along that shone so brightly from inside of me? And then Xehanort went and tempted my Darkness and now that Ven's gone, my Light is weak? What if Ven's light was the only reason Xehanort couldn't get to me? What if my Darkness proves to be too much for me to handle and I'll disappoint everyone? What if-”

“Then you can have my light!”

Sora fell silent immediately and Kairi felt heat rise up her cheeks and quickly lowered her head.

“I... what?”

“Sora, I _know_ your Light is strong enough,” Kairi clarified as she peeked up at him from under her lashes, “but if you're in doubt, I'll happily share my Light with you – and _only_ you. Not Ven, not Roxas, not anybody else. Just **you**.”

There it was. Slowly but surely, a true smile started to tug on the corners of Sora's lips and spread over his face as his eyes softened. Without warning, he pulled her into a hug and buried his head into her shoulder.

“Please,” he begged her, “ _please_ do. And please… keep believing in me.”

“Always,” she breathed in reply, wrapping her hands around him tightly.

 


End file.
